Sunday, April 30, 2006

I know where the socks go, but what about this other stuff?

Like tweezers? My tweezers are always disappearing and I am forever buying new ones. They only place I keep them is my makeup bag, so how do they just disappear?

Scissors. What's with the freakin' scissors?

All of my black pens. I only use black ink. The kids don't use that, they use all of those gel pens and stuff. Yet, all of the black ones disappear.

Oh! And my colored pencils. Of course, I think I know which little munchkins are responsible for that. But they are the good artist ones! They have TONS, really, of Crayola and RoseArt ones in their art area. Yet they sneak into my studio, searching and hunting until they find the good ones (because I'm smart enough to know I should hide them; yet, not smart enough because they find them).

Copy paper. Ummm...just refer back to the above paragraph.

ANYTHING that is MINE! I don't care what it is. If it's mine, it disappears. Right into thin air! Even things like bras and underwear...and shut up, Gayla!!! lmao!

Seriously, I think there is a spirit in this house that 'disappears' my things. Maybe it's time to burn some more sage.

Wednesday, April 26, 2006

For Cro...

Everybody thinks I'm the only person who takes pictures of manhole covers, and that I'm crazy...well, at least I'm in good company! Turquiose Cro likes them too. So here you go, Cro...just for you!

Are these really necessary in life???

I see these things, and I just wonder...what is the purpose of this? What kind of person would buy these, and would I really want to know them anyway?


Take, for instance...a plastic pig that poops candy. Would you really eat that shit???

Hmmmm...the wonders of many times have I not been able to post even one picture, and it posts this one twice... Moving on...
What about these? Doggie Leg Warmers! First of all, these weren't even in a pet shop...they were in a kid's clothing store...Justice for Girls, I think. Second...if it is so cold outside that, on the off chance your dog does indeed need leg warmers, GO BACK INSIDE!

Tuesday, April 25, 2006

The ONE day I don't have my camera in my backpack!

You know, I can take a lot. After 3 kids, not a whole lot shocks me anymore, especially in the way of bodily fluids and stuff. And like every man I pass on the road is picking his, whatever it takes to keep you busy, dude.

But today...

Today I saw something I have never seen, and hope to never see again...

Absolutely, totally, the grossest thing I have ever seen...

Well, not sure if it's any grosser than sharing a toothbrush with somebody...

Well... yeah...I think it is...

I was stopped at a light, and the woman in front of me is BRUSHING HER TEETH!!! I want to puke just thinking about it now! And it was a real live toothbrush...not one of those little things you put on your finger to swab around with.'re brushing with a real live toothbrush IN A CAR, and getting all that yucky ick out of your teeth and into your mouth, and there is nowhere to spit!

Oh God...I gotta quit writing about this now...or I really am gonna puke!

Thursday, April 20, 2006

The Outfit

Blackbird has asked to see "an outfit" for Show & Tell this week. My submission isn't the whole's only a part. The part that counts!

My outfit starts out with a pair of altered's worn with various t-shirts and shoes, with or without a hat....

This is a picture of the front...

The next few are details, so you could see it better...

And this is a picture of the back. The shorts are actually an ongoing project-they aren't finished. There are still things I want to add.

Sunday, April 16, 2006

Just so you know we're not total heathens...

We did attend mass this morning! And the ceiling didn't even let out a little creak, much less cave in on us! lol! And I have to say it is a beautiful church. can tell we haven't been since Ethan was a baby. (We just couldn't do it with him...we couldn't even leave him in the nursery because they would just page us half way through.) Ethan and Claire had NO CLUE about anything. When we got to the pew, I was telling him how to kneel down to pray, so I told him to make the sign of the cross. Ethan promptly held up both arms toward the alter, and held his index fingers out in a plus/cross sign for everyone to see! LMAO! Then, the Monsignor stands up and it gets very quiet. (Steven is holding Claire so she can see.) Then he says, "Let us pray"...and Claire, in her loud voice, says, "Okay!" ROFLMAO! Then she kept wanting to know when they were going to hand out the Easter Baskets! lol!!! Needless to say, we were pretty entertaining to the people behind us! lol!

It's weird though...I still know every word of the mass (well, except for the readings and the Homily) and every song by heart.

Saturday, April 15, 2006

Was there EVER a kid who knew herself better?

This is hilarious! My mom found this in the top of her closet and brought it to me this morning. This was an assignment I had in 4th grade...9 years old. It was called a "Research Project", though I don't know why the teacher called it that...there certainly wasn't any research involved. But, the assignment was to write a one page story on how you would run a business if you were the boss.

The funny thing is, this really could not be more spot on, even 30 (exactly) years later! The only difference is, I didn't, and probably wouldn't ever, work for a major oil company. (I probably just said "Gulf Oil" because that is who my dad worked for.) BUT, when I did work, I worked as a social worker for a non-profit (well, there goes the "rich" part! lol!) women's agency. There were NO MEN. I was the "Boss"/Director of a shelter for abused women and their children. After doing that for a couple of years, I because the Director of Community Service...educating the public about domestic violence. I was nice most of the time, but I was definitely "mean" when I had to be. I still say I'm not/wasn't/wouldn't be "mean"...but I am tough and demand the best of my employees and myself. I don't expect any more out of anyone else than I expect out of myself, and I don't put up with mediocrity or ignorance. If you don't know something you should, ask questions and find out about it...research the subject. If you can't/won't do that, then, you are mediocre and ignorant, and that definitely warrants a firing.

I must admit, if there wasn't much going on that day, I did always have a book (or two! lol!) on hand to keep myself occupied! And at non-profit agencies, you do get paid just about $25 a month! lol!

The absolute BEST part about working with a group of women is lunchtime! If we didn't go out every day, it was at least several times a week, and I know I picked up the tab a few times if one of us couldn't quite stretch our $25 a month to include so many lunches out! it idea of how to run a business...

"It's a Tough Life"

"If I were the "Boss" of a company I would be nice & sometimes I would be mean.

I would make them do everything I wanted them to do OR they would be fired.

I would have a big office bulding with lots of offices and would not let any men work there.

I would be working for Gulf Oil.

I if I were "boss" I would relaxt and take it easy. I might read a book or two.

I would pay the people twenty-five dollars a month,

I would bring a few of my frinds out to lunch every day to a very fancy resteraunt that had very good food and I would pay there way in every day because I would be rich."

*So there you have it folks...a kid of 9 years old, who knew exactly what kind of employer she would be as an adult. Actually, come to think of it, that's the kind of mother I am, too. Hmmm...don't know if that's good or bad. Should I slack up on the little guys a bit, or stay tough and expect the best? And just so you know, I typed it out with all the original mis-spellings and everything...just like I wrote it then.

Friday, April 14, 2006

Golly gee...

Who would have ever guessed my biggest moral sin was 'Wrath'??? These guys must be geniuses! lmao! (I'm telling ya, these quizes are always right!)


Take the Seven Deadly Sins Quiz

Tuesday, April 11, 2006

Yes, it is definitely Spring!

And how do I know this? Well...because of all the beautiful Spring bracelets that are coming out! I got a Brighton catalog in the mail today, and the bracelet in this picture is devine! (I'm a bracelet whore, if you didn't know.) Mother's Day is just right around the corner, you know.

Then, of course, there are THESE...
Thank goodness they are only out during Easter, or else I would weigh about 3,000 pounds. Someone would find me one day, spread out across my mattress on the floor-because the legs to the bed would have long ago given out-and my face would be covered in peanut butter and chocolate!

Saturday, April 08, 2006

So I was cool yesterday...

Today I'm just a waste of DNA. Should have been aborted when she had the chance. I've been through 4 yards of a cute print fabric and 4 yards of muslin, for a grand total of 8 (yes, EIGHT) yards of fabric...not to mention all the thread and 2 whole freakin' days of my time, and I can't even make a freakin' TOTEBAG!!!!!!!!!!!

Thursday, April 06, 2006

I am totally cool!

I am nerdier than 3% of all people. Are you nerdier? Click here to find out!

Ha! I always new it! 97% of people are nerdier than I am, and only 3% are less nerdy. And I think that is only because I think I got the question right that asked what Mn was/is on the periodic chart. (Manganese, or something like that, right?)

Monday, April 03, 2006

Our Evening/Night/Morning at the ER & Happy Birthday Steven!

*Just want to make sure everyone understands that this is ALL STEVEN'S FAULT! lol! I was not at home when this happened. He was responsible for the children's safety and wellbeing!* that everyone understands this would never have happened on my watch...while Steven was in the shower (hmmm, funny how Daddy gets to take a shower alone!) Claire decided to do some sommersaults on the couch. She fell off and hit the very pointy corner of the coffee table. This results in a big gapping wound, so it's off to the ER...

We waited for a little while before she was called back into triage. There, the nurse cleaned her up and put this little pad of 'numbing stuff' over it, and stuck it on with gauze and tape. Claire thought she had an eye patch and looked like a pirate. So here, she is holding her finger up like it's her hook and going, "Aaaaarrrrggggghhh! I'm a pirate!"

After a couple of hours, she was finally called back into a room. Steven and the other 2 were out in the waiting room, so I was passing time taking pictures. She was having fun posing and saying, "Take a picture of me like this!" and "Take a picture of me with my hands like this!" and "Take a picture of my arms doing this!" (waving her arms wildly, back and forth). For this one, she said, "Take a picture of my SpongeBob slippers!".

Ethan back in the waiting room...all he needs is a toe tag. We were just hoping somebody didn't roll him away! rofl!

Two hours after we get called back, we finally see a doctor. He agrees with us that Claire definitely needs stitches...wounds this gaping cannot be held together with glue. By this time, Steven was actually staying in the room with her, and I was going back and forth between there and the waiting room. I didn't really want to be in there while she was getting stitches, but I was waiting outside the door. Then she started crying for Mommy, so of course I had to run in. They had her wrapped up in a sheet, Steven holding her sides and a nurse holding her head. I was just talking to her, trying to calm her down. Then I actually got to be the doctor's assistant! I got to squirt some saline, or something sterile, anyway, into a bowl! And I did not violate the sterile boundary like Steven did. ;)

Claire did cry, but it wasn't as bad as I thought it would be. And here she is, right after stitches and an orange popsicle. "Take a picture of my face this way!"

Now, here she is The Morning After...yeah, she looks pitiful, but don't feel sorry for her! I'm just making her mad because I wanted to take a picture and she is trying to watch a movie. Seriously, she is bouncing around today like nothing ever happened. I bet she busts these stitches right open!