Wednesday, January 31, 2007

The Official George Clooneyton Action Figure!

Well, here it is! I finally found it and took a picture of it...the action figure Claire made of the First President of the United States, George Clooneyton!

(Scroll down a few posts if you are confused.)

In other news...I got to meet Elizabeth from Lazy Life (link is over to the right) last weekend. She's as sweet as I thought she would be and Lulu is my new best friend in the whole world! However, without really knowing me, Elizabeth offered to go shopping with me, to all the funky shops down on Congress Ave. (We were in Austin.) I hope she didn't get more than she bargained for! Well, I know she did, because she did have to sit down for a while (pppffttttt!), but I just hope she recovered enough by Monday to make it into work! Not the first time I've shopped til the other person dropped! lol! Anyway, if she'll still have me, I'd like to be her friend. I, personally, had a blast, and it's great driving by myself all the way to Austin with no kids and good music!

You know, now that I think about it...a long distance relationship would be good for me!

Ooohhhhhhhhh...I hear the Law & Order song calling to me. I'll check back in later, when I'm really back to the land of the living. I came down with a cold that is going to leave me minus one lung. It's gonna end up hacked out on the floor like a hairball from the cats.

Wednesday, January 24, 2007

I really wanna know how they do this...

Especially the Betsey Johnson part!!!

What Your Red Outfit Means

You're bold and risk taking when it comes to style.
You are proud of who you are. It doesn't matter what others think.
A complete flirt, men are drawn to your confidence.

Designer match: Betsey Johnson

Signature accessory: A studded leather hobo bag

But...this one??? I never heard of her. I was hoping for Melissa Etheridge! I gotta remember that, "...lazy as white paint on the wall" comment! ha!
You Are Ani Difranco!

Honest, real, and well liked.
You're not limited by any boundaries.
"And you can call me crazy
But I think you're as lazy as white paint on the wall"

Monday, January 22, 2007

A funny thing happened on the way to Target...

You really aren't out of money if you still have checks!

So, way back during the first week of January, I had to go to Target. So I'm saying to Steven, "I need the checks. Where are the checks?", and he motioned and mumbled like he always does, and I never understand but pretend I do. (If a doctor's talking was like his handwriting, that's what it sounds like.)

So I found a book of checks and grabbed it; Allison and I merrily on our way to Target, which is right next to World Market, and some other store was involved, but it's all blurry after that. Then we came home, and I haven't written a check since.

So the other day, Steven got something in the mail from our old bank in account that has not been in use in over a year and a half, but was never completely closed. It had like 5 bucks in it or something. Anyway, SOMEONE had written some checks off that account all over San Antonio, they all bounced, we had accummulated a bit of debt with all the charges, and I've got the phone in my hand, ready to dial 911 ASAP because Steven was having a heart attack!

All I could understand with all the heavy breathing were words here and there..."Amoco" "checks" "$191.82!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" "fees" "$75.00!!" "What" "the" "Fuck!" "Stolen identity" "Lawyer. We have lawyers for this." "FUCK!" "I can NEVER get things under control!" ...oh, and the pacing...I forgot to tell you about the pacing..."We're screwed!" "I'm gonna have to go to jail." "You think your Mom can help you with the kids?" "Holy Shit, Lauri! What am I gonna do?".

Of course, nothing I could say would help to calm him down at all. And all I knew was...It wasn't me! This was the one thing he couldn't blame me for, because I didn't even know that account still existed, much less that we actually had checks for it. And the fact that he would have them out in plain view for me to just grab and run off to Target or Barnes & Noble or anywhere??? No. Way.

I finally told him he had to stop or he was going to have a heart attack, and asked if that was what he really wanted? His response? "Your Dad! Can I talk to your Dad? He would know what to do!" So I get Dad on the phone, and guess what Dad told him...THE EXACT SAME EXACT THINGS I HAD EXACTLY BEEN TELLING HIM TO DO EXACTLY THE NEXT DAY, EXACTLY!!! But for some reason, this means nothing coming from ME, who was raised my Mr. Finance himself, and had been grilled and drilled daily for like 23 years or something. Ahhh...I remember our first Financial Meeting...Buras, LA...somewhere around was out for the night and dad didn't have any idea of what to do with me and he taught us how bank accounts and checks and credit cards work. ;) Just kidding Dad...but, you and I both know it's true!

Steven did calm down a little at this point, but he just kept searching and searching for that checkbook. I was just glad I didn't have anything to do with it!

Steven: "I found the checkbook!"
Me: "Oh good."
Steven: "It was in the bottom of your backpack."
Me: *insert wide-eyed shocked face here* "Huh?"
Steven: "Yeah. You wrote these checks."
Me: "Oh good! Now you know someone didn't steal your identity!" *Big Smile Here*

Somehow, he didn't see the bright side in this; that it was me and not someone else.

Sometimes, he just has no sense of humor!

Anyway...we got it all worked out, and went and apologized and explained what happened to Target...for real...because I couldn't afford to be Blacklisted from there. And frankly, neither could they!

Friday, January 12, 2007

Claire made breakfast for me...

She actually has made my breakfast twice this week. One morning it was a salad...of celery stalks and leaves, carrots, bananas, apples (including the core) and SALT! Somehow I managed to get rid of that one before she knew about it.

But this one was much better! How could I refuse?

Saturday, January 06, 2007


The reknowned historian, Claire, has just announced that the First President of the United States was George Clooneyton!

*I am NEVER going to stop laughing from that one!*

On to other business...Target Business...there is some GREAT new stuff at Target! In their "One Dollar to $2.50 Section", they have a bunch of Curious George stuff...memo pads, pens, tiny Georges, coloring books and some stationary packs. I picked up a couple of coloring books for the kids-these were actually a dollar, which I'm afraid is actually a bargain for coloring books these days!

And I got a little package of pens and 2 packs of the stationary, also. These packages are really cute-there is a pad of paper for writing your letters on in the middle, then there are envelopes on either side. When it's open it looks like this...

Then it closes up and looks like this.

The big plus...IT WORKS! It actually got Ethan and Claire to write thank-you notes for Christmas gifts!

HEY MA! Remember these shoes??? Although back in the early 70's they were tan. But, you wouldn't let me have a pair. Kelly Kleinpeter had some, though, so we traded...I don't remember what pair I gave her in return, but you made me trade her back. Well, I bought my own now! And I'm 40 years old and you can't make me return them! lol! Another Target bargain. They had them in tan, also, but I like dark brown better.

Claire has been wanting cowboy boots for a while. She was wearing a pair of Ethan's old ones, from when he went through his 'Superman in Cowboy Boots' stage. (Wish I had a picture of that!!!) Anyway, she's grown out of them, and she found these pink ones at Target and had to have them. And how can I refuse my 'shoe daughter' new shoes, when she inherited the disease from me? So here she is, looking so tough in her new pink boots.

And here's a close up...

You can also see another cute Target find over at ArtSmith. I really should be a contributor to the "Slave to Target" blog! lol!

Tuesday, January 02, 2007

Quick! Hurry, please!

Something is very wrong here in BlogSmith land! Take their temperatures, call the doctors (pediatrician, psychologist and psychiatrist), do some DNA testing , or whatever you have to do! The children I gave birth to are not in this house today.

And how do I know this, you wonder?

There has been NO TV all day long!

WHAT THE F*CK?!? (see, I knew that would be your response!)

Yep, that's right...the kids have been home all day today (they go back to school tomorrow) and not only have they not watched TV, it Hasn't. Even. Been. Turned. On! Plus...I've only had to intervene in, I think, 3 fights/arguments.

Not to mention that I braved the vaccuum cleaner once again. I even vaccuumed between the cushions on the couch! Sucked up a lot of chunky things...don't know what they were because I was too afraid to even look, but I bet they were Legos.

Something weird is going on in 2007!